Hey you. Hi, Friends. I know we haven’t talked in a while. That’s partly my fault. I really just haven’t known what to say. So I didn’t. say. anything. I see that wasn’t loving. I realize now it wasn’t loving. Not really. I tried to reason with myself that not saying something WAS the loving thing. That you would probably just get mad at me. But I just can’t keep justifying that. I thought I needed more time to pray. More time to consider what to say. But now days have turned to weeks, weeks to months, and yes…months to years. And what keeps coming into my heart is that I need to tell you this. I don’t do it pridefully (O, Lord, help me not to say it pridefully). I don’t say it to somehow promote myself as if I have it all together. I don’t. Just ask my kids, my husband, even my…dog. But, when I consider the weight of not telling you…it’s too much. I have to say it. Now.
Friends, some of you are driving dangerously close to the edge. You are slamming on the brakes every time you go down that hill of struggle. One of these days, the brakes are going to give out. The brakes will give out and you will go. Too. Far. I wish you didn’t like walking so close to the fire. I wish you didn’t like the rush of excitement you get. I wish I could help you want God more. I wish I could help you see that God is the most exciting thing any of us could ever hope to live for. But I can’t. You have to learn that for yourself. God has to show you that himself. You may have to crash and wreck coming down that hill of struggle before you will see Him. You may have to lay flat on your back so all you can do is look up. You may have to have every leg pulled out from under you so you can fall on Him. I don’t want it to have to go like that. But it might. You see, I really love you. Not because I’m some amazingly loving person. It’s God that makes my heart this way. He loves me first; then, his love has to spill out of me because I can’t contain it all. And this love spills out on the people He puts in my life. And you are some of those precious people.
Friends, some of you live more “safely,” but the result is the same. I don’t want to see you fall for it, to watch you trade True Love for a pale imitation. No earthly thing can complete you. Not success, or money, or a relationship. I know; I tried to find fulfillment there too. And I just kept being…empty. I couldn’t see the thing that answered every need had been there all along, waiting. Not a thing, a person. Jesus. As a child I sang about him, read about him, looked at picture books about him. But I still didn’t know him. Then one day, when I grew so tired of trying to find that one thing…I felt Him near me. Speaking to my heart. Telling me to stop looking to the world and look to Him alone. He created the world and sustains it…so why would I go to the created thing when I should be going to its Creator? I knew in that instant Jesus was real. He had watched and waited. But then the waiting was over and He acted upon my heart. He drew me to Himself. And my life has never been the same. I am redefined. I am new. I am not the same anymore. I want different things. I love different things. I say different things. I see different things. Life has completely turned upside down. I know in my heart, this is what I was made for…to love Him. To live in Him. And I want this to be true for you too. Sooo badly. My heart aches to think you aren’t living in the good of this yet. And I want you to know, I’m praying that will change. I couldn’t keep it to myself any more. Respond how you will, my heart for you will not change. God’s heart for you will not change. Jesus died for you. No one else will ever do that for you. So, when I considered the weight of not telling you, I simply couldn’t keep quiet. Eternity for you hangs in the balance. Please don’t ignore it.
In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation [that is, the atoning sacrifice, and the satisfying offering] for our sins [fulfilling God’s requirement for justice against sin and placating His wrath]. I John 4:10 (Amplified Version)
With much love and great affection,