Yearning to Be a Daddy’s Little Girl

Yearning to Be a Daddy’s Little Girl

As we approach Father’s Day, this is the time of year when I sometimes become reflective of the fact that I did not have a relationship with my biological father as I was growing up. When I was approximately 3-4 years old, my parents separated. The last memory, I had of my father in the house was of him changing a light bulb in the hallway. After that, it would be 30 years before I saw him again.

Growing up, I remained hopeful year after year – milestone after milestone that my father would be there to share in the various celebrations. I would wonder, “where is he and is he thinking about me and my brothers?” At some point in my childhood, I remember reading a scripture in the bible that said, “when my mother and father forsake me, then the Lord will take me up.” (Psalm 27:10) As a child, I didn’t know the full meaning of the word forsake, but I knew that this scripture was relevant to my situation. There have been many days and nights that I have meditated on this Word, asking the Lord to be a father to me, the fatherless. Now, I am a mother and I observe the loving relationship that my daughters have with their father and realize that this is something that I not only yearned for as a child, but needed.

When I wrote my book, No Longer a Bridesmaid, perhaps the hardest chapter for me to write was the Daddy’s Little Girl chapter because I was writing about something that was 1) very personal to me and 2) something that I felt I had a skewed perspective of. I relied heavily on my research to write this chapter of my book. After each phone call or meeting with someone who had a close relationship with their dad, and considered themselves a daddy’s girl, I would fantasize and envision what this must have been like to have a father like that.

sad woman_red topEven after reconnecting with my father after not having seen or heard from him in over 30 years – we still do not have anything that at most feigns a father-daughter friendship much less relationship; and that to me is very sad. However, I am comforted by God’s Word that says He is a father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:5a) and the God of all comfort (2 Corinthians 1:3b). He blessed me with a double portion in a wonderful husband who is a great father. I could not have asked for more. God knew what I needed and I no longer spend time fantasizing about what I feel I missed out on, but thanking God for what He has blessed me with!

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Terry Cato About Terry Cato

Terry Cato is a Talk Show Host, Author and relationship blogger. She is the Founder of Relationships 411, a blog community dedicated to healthy relationships and marriages. She is the Host of Real Talk w/Terry a Bay Area talk show focusing on relationship and lifestyle topics. Her memoir, “No Longer a Bridesmaid!” chronicles the 7 years she was single, celibate and believing God for a husband. Feel Free to Follow Terry on Twitter and visit her website for more information about the Author.

Comments

  1. Oh Terry, I cannot tell you how much this hits home for me. My dad was there but an alcoholic, absent emotionally and when he was “present” he was abusive in many ways. So I used to wonder the same thing, what would it be like to have a father who looks on me with love and kindness? Like you, the Lord blessed me with a good man as a husband and yes, what a blessing. God really does take care of us, especially when the people that are supposed to care for us don’t.

    [Reply]

    Terry Cato

    Terry Cato Reply:

    Aw Cherie! Thanks for sharing!! I love writing for this blog … It’s my therapy.

    [Reply]

  2. Tirra Taylor says:

    This really blessed me!! It’s sometimes hard to put into words the feelings I have of bring a fatherless daughter. I’ve heard those scriptures often, but never actually applied them to my situation. Thanks for the new perspective!!

    [Reply]

    Terry Cato

    Terry Cato Reply:

    Tirra, so glad this blessed you sister – friend! God bless!!

    [Reply]

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